first and 15

my canvas was puddled, gesso was like glue to my feet, and so i started acrylic underpainting, large brushes, the first three and a half minutes, the choppers flying through flare smoke, forest of the war, napalm strike, without much contrast in dark yet, it was too wet to get oils in there, but my release was blowing pigment as smoke at the end of my day. im exhausted. but it felt good to paint, or it felt horrible to paint as well. my body is killing me, my head hurts and i need to eat something, vikram will give me reiki soon, and people say ive used more color than theyve ever seen, so overall i think it was a good start, a good place to begin, the birds and river behind me, my feet red and yellow, my heart pounding at times, but friends coming to save me for smoke breaks, tho i had a cigarette in my mouth for the whole time. stuart advised me to put a tarp over it due to the shit weather we've been having, even tho i think i am detached and want the world to take this thing from me, its probably a good idea, ill post some snapshots later, after i recuperate.